The Closing of a Chapter

Destination: Unknown
Total Miles: Unknown
Total Cost: Unknown

So...this blog has been tracking my many journeys, and I would be remiss if I failed to post about the ending of a journey that began over 5 years ago.

On Election Day 2008, I was finishing one of my last critical care clinicals of nursing school and was assigned to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) at Spartanburg Regional. The day before, I had been complaining to a fellow senior nursing student how discouraged I was that I had not found my "niche" like so many of our classmates. She and I prayed and left it in God's hands. The next day, He made it very plain where my niche was: the NICU.

I loved every minute of those 7 hours. I loved the staff. I loved the babies. I loved going on deliveries. I loved it.

And when my instructor sent out an email the next day stating that the NICU at Spartanburg Regional had requested a practicum student for the Spring, I did the unthinkable: I changed from a safe bet in an ICU with a good friend to an unknown NICU. The 200+ hours I put in for my practicum in the Spring were grueling...and I loved every minute of it! I experienced the joy of new life and the sorrow of death. And when the manager approached me halfway through and offered me a job, I took it without looking back.

I spent 4 months in orientation and prep before heading to night shift.

And I've spent the last four years on night shift...probably some of the craziest years of my life!

I don't know how many hours I put in...the hours don't matter, honestly.

I don't know how many deliveries I went on...how many babies I admitted or transitioned...how many bottles I fed...how many IVs I started...in hindsight, none of the statistics are important.

What is far more important are the friendships I have made, the lessons I have learned, the babies I have seen grow from tiny 1+ pounders to toddlers, and the lives that have touched mine.

My coworkers and I have laughed and cried...we have supported each other even when we had our personal differences...and the list could go on and on.

I could list so many lessons that I have learned in the last five years...things they do NOT teach in nursing school...but I think I will share the six that come to mind:

1. Neonates will teach you how to defy all odds...watch closely...even the tiniest is born with a pugnacious attitude.
2. Your coworkers are people. They have problems just like you, and sometimes they will bring those problems to work. Be willing to forgive and maybe offer a listening ear. Treat them as you want to be treated...with love and respect.
3. When people are put in new situations, they react differently. Just because a neonate's family was gruff earlier, do not assume they are always like that....they were just thrown into a scary new and unexpected world.
4. Remember, you are responsible for your response...(this one is sometimes harder than it sounds).
5. EVERY person that enters your world is important, whether their job is taking out the trash or fielding calls. Treat them as such. Just like you love to be recognized for doing a good job, take time to thank them, no matter how menial their task.
6. Neonatal nurses are a different breed. Spend enough time with them, and you won't be the same person. They will advocate for a patient and stand up to any one. Do not enter their unit without expecting some questioning stares or gruffness. They are extremely protective of their tiny patients. They will call a baby a 'troll' one minute and cuddle that baby the next. They have strong opinions, developed from countless hours spent discussing life. Behind that sometimes blunt exterior, there lies a heart of gold that has faced down death and said "Not today." They have seen what few others have: a first breath and a last. They are NICU nurses.

I have been privileged the last five years to work with some of the strongest people I know. As I close this chapter of my life, I must express my gratitude.

To each of my coworkers: nurses, doctors, respiratory terrorists (I mean, therapists), secretaries, cleaning staff, and transcriptionists...Thank you.

To all of my babies and their parents...Thank you.

I would not be the person I am today without each of you.

Through thick and thin...I am eternally grateful.





(also...to all the Starbucks people...Thank you for the amazing hot chocolate and putting up with me, especially the last two years. I have maintained a semi-stable state of sanity largely impart because of your encouragement in those brief moments you hand me my tall extra-whip hot chocolates. Blessings!)